Today on the blog, we’ve got one of those posts that I just know is going to so helpful to so many couples.
Wedding invitation wording can be one of those etiquette minefields in the lead up to your big day. Should you opt for something formal or casual? Do you need to include your parents? Should both sets of parents be included on the invitation? Depending on your family situation and the style of your wedding, there are a few factors to consider.
So, taking the mystery out of how to word your wedding invitations, the wonderful Jo Bryant here to help. Jo is a modern etiquette and wedding consultant, who recently shared her etiquette essentials with us on on the blog.
And today, she’s sharing her wisdom on all things wedding invitations, so listen up!
Photo by Ingvild Kolnes // Stationery by Brown Linen Design via Bridal Musings | Invitation Suite Above by Rachel Marvin Creative via Etsy
Why Do Invitations Matter?
In our world of instant digital communication, there is something wonderfully traditional and personal about receiving a gorgeous wedding invitation by post.
Aside from conveying essential information to your guests, the style of your invitations also give guests a sneek-peek into what kind of wedding day they can expect. So, choose wisely…
Who, when, where…
The invitation is a key-fact document for your guests and should let them know who is getting married, who is hosting, the date and time, the location of the ceremony and reception, the RSVP details and, if unusual or non-traditional, the dress code.
Who Gets a Mention?
The wording on the invitation can get very intricate, particularly when there is a tricky family scenario. Similarly, there may be many people contributing to the cost of the wedding, all of whom want a mention.
The following examples and guidance should help solve wording dilemmas, even for the most complex scenarios.
Formal and Traditional
The classic, formal wording is based on the assumption that the bride’s parents are married and are hosting the wedding. It’s not suitable for all couples today, but here is the traditional way:
Mr and Mrs Anthony Capulet
request the pleasure of
your company at the marriage
of their daughter
Juliet
to
Mr Romeo Montague
at St Peter’s Church, Lovetown
on Saturday 17th June 2017
at 3 o’clock
and afterwards at
The Shakespeare Hotel
Something more Friendly?
If the bride’s parents are hosting but the formal and traditional wording is too stuffy, then try this more relaxed, modern alternative:
Mr and Mrs Anthony Capulet
request the pleasure of
your company to celebrate the marriage of
Juliet and Romeo
on Saturday 17th June 2017
at 2pm at St Peter’s Church, Lovetown
Photo by A Guy + A Girl Photography // Stationery by Rachel Shuman Armentano via Bridal Musings
The Independents
For a parent-free invitation – where the couple are hosting their wedding – then the wording can be relatively simple. It’s up to you if you want to include surnames.
“Romeo [Montague] and Juliet [Capulet] request the pleasure of your company at their
marriage at…”
or
“Romeo and Juliet invite you to celebrate their marriage on…”
Everyone Wants a Mention…
If both sets of parents are hosting, along with the couple, then a simple catch-all solution is needed. This is also helpful if people are remarried or if the situation is particularly complex:
“Romeo Montague and Juliet Capulet, together with their parents, request the pleasure of/invite you…”
Photo by Blinkbox Photos // Stationery by Twenty O Four via Bridal Musings
My Mum is remarried…
If the bride’s mother has remarried – so the hosts are her mother and stepfather – then traditionally it would read:
“Mr and Mrs Peter Lawrence request the pleasure…” [this assumes the mother has changed her name on remarriage]
“Mr John Peters and Mrs Jane Smith request the pleasure…” [if the mother has not changed her name upon remarriage and either retained her previous married name or reverted to her maiden name]
My Dad is remarried…
If the bride’s father and stepmother are the hosts, then his name and her married name are used:
“Mr and Mrs Anthony Capulet request the pleasure…”
Photo by Jeff Brummett Visuals // Stationery by Paper Planet Designs via Bridal Musings
Mum and Dad are Both Remarried and Co-hosting…
If all parents and stepparents are co-hosting, and all want a mention, then try this:
“Mr and Mrs Anthony Capulet and Mr and Mrs Peter Lawrence request the pleasure…”
Mum and Dad are Divorced, Remarried and Co-Hosting with Us…
If both of the bride’s parents are remarried and co-hosting with the couple, then this is a long, but inclusive solution:
“Romeo Montague and Juliet Capulet, together with Mr and Mrs Anthony Capulet and Mr and Mrs Peter Lawrence, request the pleasure…”
The Catch-all for Complicated Divorces and New Partners
In complicated situations, this is a tried and tested solution:
“Romeo Montague and Juliet Capulet, together with their parents, request the pleasure of/invite you…”
Same Sex Marriage
There are no different rules, so you can use the above examples as guidance.
Invitation Suite by Rachel Marvin Creative via Etsy
Great advice, yet again! Read Jo’s Five Modern Etiquette Essentials here.
Jo offers ‘Aisle Style’, personalised bridal image, confidence and deportment workshops, and ‘Wedding Companion’, a flexible, bespoke pay-as-you-go planning support and advisory service.
Make sure you visit her website to find out more information on her invaluable services!
