Welcome back to Groom’s Week on Bridal Musings.
This week we’re giving brides a few days off and letting the guys take over!
And now it’s time to discuss perhaps the most daunting prospect of your wedding day, The Groom’s Speech.
Making a speech or a toast on your wedding day is a bit of a juggling act.
The Best Man gets to bring the joke book and the father of the bride (hopefully) welcomes you to the family, and gushes about his little girl. But for your speech, you need to do all of the above, as well as thanking your guests and sharing your love story.
No big deal.
Remembering all you’ve got to say, and delivering it with panache is a tough job, but luckily, we’ve enlisted one of the most debonair gents in the wedding industry to help.
Bruce Russell is a luxury wedding planner (who has shared his insightful tips before, on the blog). Along with creating beautiful and sensational events, he has also launched The Bridal Room, a go-to inspiration site for discerning brides and grooms.
As part of The Bridal Room experience, Bruce often takes grooms out for the day, coaching them in the ways of fine tailoring, wine tasting, and speech making.
So, who better to help you (or your other half) prepare the perfect speech? Take it away Mr Russell…
10 Expert Tips For Writing a Great Groom’s Speech
It’s no secret that the key to a successful speech is in the preparation.
While the bride may have planned her part of the big day down to the very last detail, I am afraid, ladies, the groom’s speech is one thing that has to be left to the chaps.
For most grooms, this may well be their first experience of public speaking and being faced with a sea of familiar faces can actually make the task all-the-more daunting.
Try to be as supportive as you can – they’ll doubtless be fretting so if in doubt and if you’re keen to offer some counsel, why not wave these top tips under their nose…
1. Manners Maketh The Man
Always begin by thanking those who have spoken before you.
Your Father-in-Law is a must (forget him and there may well be dire consequences!) and your Best Man, too. Don’t forget to also thank your beautiful bride and her family and yours too for that matter – all of these people will have offered invaluable and well-meaning support in the run-up to the day.
And where possible, look to mention specific names as it makes for a far more personal and heart-felt speech.
2. Mum’s the Word
Please don’t forget the mothers – they are a cornerstone to the planning process and it’s important to show your gratitude.
On this point, in particular, remember that in your capacity as groom, you are actually speaking for both your new wife and you, so make sure you refer to ‘we’ not ‘I’.
3. Short and Sweet
The best speeches are simple, short and pithy – ideally under 10 minutes.
Your guests have a fair few speeches to sit through and no one wants to be nursing a glass of warm, flat champagne late into the night!
4. Lighten Up
While a groom’s speech most certainly shouldn’t be treated as a stand- up comedy routine, weddings are jovial affairs and adding some gentle humor and the odd witty comment will certainly make for a good speech.
Plus, once you’ve roused a ripple of laughter or two, you’ll relax a little.
That said, do try to remember this is not the time for ‘inside jokes’, ritual humiliation or laddish humor – it’s a family affair, after all!
5. Be Sincere
It may not come naturally in front of a room of assembled friends and family, but try to speak from the heart.
This is probably the most important speech you will ever give so please do justice to the gravitas of this big day and remember to tell your bride how much you love her.
6. Put the We in Wedding
Don’t forget where you are – this is your wedding day and you are sat alongside your new wife.
Your life together should be the essence of your speech, not sordid tales from your Stag Do or a list of your own life achievements.
Use your speech to recall some of the really special moments of your relationship – the milestones – how you met, as well as some of the little endearing details that spring to mind.
Avoid any content that might embarrass your already blushing bride, though!
7. Presenting the Wedding Party
Don’t forget the gift-giving – flowers for the mothers and, if you haven’t already given gifts, then you’ll need something to thank your Bridesmaids, Ushers and Best Man.
8. Gracious Gracias
When wrapping up your speech revert back to the thank yous – this time to all the family and friends who have assisted throughout the planning process, and your best man for his support.
9. Raise a Glass
And lastly, the toasts – to your bridesmaids and, of course, your new bride.
10. A Final Note
And if you forget absolutely everything on the day itself – including your notes – just remember to be genuine, honest and cheery.
You are not pitching to the Dragon’s Den, you’re giving thanks to your bride, family and friends for all their help and for sharing such a momentous and happy occasion with you. If you get a laugh, a cry and a cheer then all the better but don’t get too worried about it, gents.
It’s only 10 minutes and then you can let your hair down!
Such wonderful tips, my favourite is “Put the WE in Wedding” – so many grooms turn their toast into another best man speech, so this is a key one to remember.
Have you any more advice for speech giving? Don’t forget to leave it in the comments below!
See the rest of our Grooms’ Week Musings here.